Episode?

The past few days have been awful. Maybe it's a depressive episode of some kind, but more likely, it's a recurrence of the PMDD I had as a teenager. It's bad. I'm aware enough to realize that something is really wrong, but I already feel like I'm drowning. Hopefully this will only last a few days. All the minor depressive episodes only last a few days. Just a  few days. People must think I'm crazy... I am... but only part. The other part is trying so hard all the time to be a good wife and mother. It's all I ever do. The only real friends I have are my husband, my sisters, and a couple in-laws. All my other friends have moved on, faded away. Finances are stressing me out so much. I don't want my husband to get me a birthday present. I don't want to buy a halloween costume. Because we can't afford it. I'm suffocating. I'm suffocating. I'm dying. I can't breathe.